NEW ORLEANS — The Pelicans have reportedly entered training camp with a bold organizational objective: making the playoffs and discovering what, exactly, happens after the regular season ends.
Team officials confirmed the goal this week, describing it as ‘ambitious but theoretically achievable.’
Several players were then shown a bracket.
Sources say there was a brief silence.
‘We’ve heard about this,’ one fictional staffer said. ‘Apparently if you win enough games, they just keep scheduling more.’
The discovery has already changed preparation in New Orleans.
Coaches are introducing concepts such as ‘playoff rotations,’ ‘seven-game series’ and ‘games that do not count toward the 82.’
Players initially believed the last one was a scheduling error.
The Pelicans have spent much of recent history treating the postseason like an optional downloadable expansion pack, but the organization now believes the current roster can make a serious push.
That has created several logistical questions.
Do hotel reservations continue into late April?
Does the arena stay open?
Are fans allowed to attend games numbered higher than 82?
Team employees have reportedly begun researching all possibilities.
The biggest concern remains the playoff bracket itself, which appears to contain several teams that are also trying to win.
New Orleans found this unnecessarily complicated.
Still, the Pelicans remain optimistic.
The plan is simple: win enough regular-season games to qualify.
Then ask somebody what happens next.
