Player File · NOP · #1

Zion Williamson

Zion Williamson stories, basketball nonsense and other necessary filings.

Satirical media-day press conference image of a smiling New Orleans basketball player seated at a table while eating fried chicken.

ADDED TO THE BAG

NBA Media Day Begins Annual Tradition of Every Player Being in the Best Shape of His Life

Across the league, players have simultaneously added muscle, lost weight, improved their jumpers and discovered previously unknown levels of maturity.

Satirical realistic image of a powerful basketball player undergoing detailed body-composition testing in a high-tech performance laboratory.

BUILT DIFFERENT

Study Finds Zion Williamson’s Offseason Transformation Has Now Become Annual Scientific Event

Researchers say the yearly cycle of gym photos, body-composition analysis and ‘best shape of his life’ reports is now predictable enough to chart.