THE ARCHIVES
NBA Celebrates 50 Years Since ABA Merger by Accidentally Making Four Teams Look Better
The league celebrates history by accidentally reopening the question of why anyone stopped dressing like this.
Player File · BKN
Nikola Jokić
Nikola Jokić stories, basketball nonsense and other necessary filings.
RECURRING THEMES
NBA HISTORYCOACH SPEAK
MOST READ FILENBA Celebrates 50 Years Since ABA Merger by Accidentally Making Four Teams Look Better
FILE STATUS6 stories · case remains open
LATEST FILES
Full file ↓Nikola Joki at the Desk
Files6
Current teamBrooklyn Nets
TodayChecking schedule…
Latest evidence
NBA Celebrates 50 Years Since ABA Merger by Accidentally Making Four Teams Look Better
The league celebrates history by accidentally reopening the question of why anyone stopped dressing like this.
All Nikola Jokić Files
SUPERSTAR CORNER
NBA Begins Search For Next Face Of League, Discovers Fans Hate Every Candidate For Different Reason
The league has several obvious superstar candidates and approximately one objection for every basketball fan online.
BENCH MOB
DeMar DeRozan Told He’ll Come Off Bench, Begins Preparing To Score 24 Points Anyway
Denver has a new sixth man. DeRozan has already informed the mid-range that nothing else has changed.
FREE AGENCY ACTIVITIES
Jokić Says He’ll Re-Sign With Nuggets, Politely Declines PowerPoint About Team Direction
Denver prepared a five-year vision deck. Jokić already knew the part where he comes to work and plays basketball.
CRUNCH TIME
Nikola Jokić Recommends Six Months in Europe, Where Missing Two Free Throws Can Become a Municipal Issue
Jokić wants NBA players to experience European pressure, where a late missed free throw can apparently remain under civic review for years.
HOOPERS OFF DUTYFICTION
Jokić’s Horses Reportedly in Best Shape of Their Lives Ahead of NBA Season
Denver wanted a Nikola Jokić conditioning update. Serbia sent back a scouting report on several extremely prepared horses.